Mom's Soul Cafe

Hay House furnished me with this 2-CD Set in exchange for a review, but I intend to purchase it for anyone and everyone I know. I, honestly, love, love, love The Importance of Being Extraordinary.

I loved these CDs for the authenticity between Eckhart Tolle and Wayne Dyer. It’s a question and answer format where each (or both) give a perspective on different parts of his spiritual philosophy. It is also an interview between the two, both asking and reflecting on the other’s experiences.

For instance, Dyer talks about his experience of leukemia, and Tolle questions him as an interviewer. Tolle also gives his insight as to what has changed in Dyer since his healing with John of God, the Brazilian healer Dyer credits with his cancer recovery, and with his newfound feeling of a more genuine state of awareness.

I have read many books on Consciousness, including books by Dyer and Tolle. I love my books, for sure. I usually do not want to listen to any book on CD, especially a spiritual book – I want room for highlights and comments. And that is another appeal of the format of the CDs – it’s not just a book being read. It doesn’t feel like rehashed material. It feels like Dyer and Tolle are truly sharing their experiences with me as I listen to them.

The recording is from a conference in Hawaii, where Dyer lives. He invited Eckhart Tolle to come to the conference as his guest. The two play very well off of one another. They are alike enough in their beliefs to give continuity to the overall gist of the CDs, but they each arrived to a place of heightened consciousness in different ways, which they share throughout the talk.

I didn’t just listen to the CDs once; I have listened multiple times. I even made it a meditation of sorts; closing my eyes and listening, following my breath; opening my heart to what they have to say and learning from the gifts of growth they impart.

In their knowledge, I learned a ton, but through their humility I felt like they don’t mind letting us know that even the most spiritually influential people among us still have room to grow, as Dwyer did grow spiritually from his sickness.

I feel grateful to have The Importance of Being Extraordinary in my library. I absolutely, 100 percent recommend this CD-set to anyone. It’s funny, helpful, interesting and fulfilling to the mind and soul.

True to my word, I hired an organizer for 2013. My purpose in hiring her was twofold. One, I wanted to get organized. Who doesn’t? Two, on a more divine note, I wanted to get rid of the clutter, the stuff that is no longer serving its function in my life, to make room for a new, more purpose-filled life.

I started the year with a vision board. My vision this year is to make money on my own. With the building market recovering nicely, Hubby is doing well by us. But I long for checks with my name on the top.

So I hired Alison Henson. I committed to 20 hours with her. We started with my office, and more specifically my office closet. It’s a walk-in closet, but the term walk-in was no longer relevant. At one time I kept the kids’ craft material on a shelf. But one day, a day when my head was turned for two seconds, they went in the closet and pulled every, single thing off the shelf at the top. In addition to all of the stuff already on the floor, there was now foam stickers of every shape and size, sheets, puzzles, glitter, sparkly pipe cleaners, beads (big beads, small beads, foam beads, string, shoe laces), Halloween candy, Easter candy, Candy I took away from them for not asking. I could go on and on about what a disaster this space had become. It took three visits with Alison to get this closet under control, but after it was done, the rest of the office fell into place.

Alison and I even took a trip to The Container Store to get some Elfa stuff. I bought three for the office and two for my daughter’s room. They had a sale for 30% off. We tackled my living room too.

After 20 hours with Alison I have accomplished more than I could have in a month, every day, six hours a day. I realized, in my own, past methods to de-clutter I used quick fixes – a tub here or there – rather than redefining how I do things. That’s where she helped the most – to redefine how I operate in my space.

She was also my therapist. She listened to what a failure I have felt like for my home being so messy and how my kids never listen to me when I tell, no threaten with every toy they like, them to clean up their messy ways. She coddled me into forgiving myself.

She also had me doing things I didn’t think I had time to do. My original plan was to have her help with my bedroom closet. It had gotten out of control from mornings of hurried dressings to take the kids to school and nightly exhaustion to get everyone, myself included, in the bed. I discovered it was easier for me to go through my closet with her voice in my head asking me, “How long has it been since you have worn this?” or “Do you really think you are going to fit into that again one day?” I found myself letting go of all of the clothes I previously had deemed keep-worthy for one reason or another.

And even though Alison and I had shopped for the Elfa drawers for my daughter’s room together, I did the work to organize her room myself.

None of this was easy, by the way. But so worth it!

Hiring an organizer was not something I normally would have done. It’s like buying a painting I think I can do myself. The chaos told me I needed to do something out of the box. I needed to open up my energetic flow – that Universal energy that sees how big I am, how much a part of something large and expansive I belong to, if I can only get out of my own way. Clearing the clutter helped open that up. It was cleansing, healing, and feels big – like I paid off a big debt.

And it worked too. Since completing my work with Alison I have received numerous calls for my skills. I see my desires coming to fruition at an ideal pace. I am suddenly at the perfect place at the perfect time to be in a position to see my vision board become a reality.

I won’t kid myself into thinking my space will stay neat and tidy forever. But next time I refuse to wait until the mess holds me down. In the future, I’m going to decide my budget, write down my needs and call my new best friend, my organizer, Alison.

Organizer: Alison Henson, 404-272-6970, ahenson@mindspring.com

Tapping is an old form of healing known also as Emotional Freedom Technique, or EFT for short. Tapping Into Ultimate Success by Jack Canfield & Pamela Bruner is a new take on this old healing technique.

Tapping uses acupressure points to eliminate unwanted emotional behavior. I’ve heard of people using it for anything from food cravings to smoking to sleep issues. One practitioner told me she used in on a child who was afraid of fireworks and other loud noises with great success.

I was interested to read the book Tapping Into Ultimate Success because I wanted to know how to apply this EFT technique in my life or in the lives of others. I was given the book from Hay House Publishing to review. The book explains its method well – it even comes with a DVD that is very helpful. I sat in the coffee shop tapping away on myself and proudly showed friends my new knowledge.

I liked the updated method in Tapping Into Ultimate Success from Canfield and Bruner. From what I can tell, past EFT methods include saying the negative situation, for example, I am not scared of that dog, while tapping the acupressure points over and over. One would continue the tapping sequence until the negative emotion is no longer felt. But Canfield and Bruner go a step further. They include positive reinforcement statements. For example, Even though I am afraid of being criticized, I choose to feel excitement about the situation.

The book is thorough, it includes a lot of information and it is great knowledge to have. However, I felt like I was studying for a class. It is a lot of information that if you are not able to use in a clinical practice, I’m not sure is something to keep up. Initially I was very excited, but without regular practice I lost interest. And, I’m not sure tapping works that well doing it on ones self. I felt that I got something from the practice on myself, but I couldn’t help but wonder how much more effective it would have been for me to go to a person that practices the method regularly – like a healer.

I have had friends that have energy healing practices and psychiatry and psychology practices that love this book and use the information regularly. For them, it’s the perfect tool to add to a practice. For me, I’m not sorry for the time I took to read the book, I like it, but I do not see this as a miracle solution to all of my personal growth. It’s a just a good addition.

I miss my grandma. It’s funny to feel such a longing for her now. When she was here I didn’t see her enough, especially after my kids were born. But she was always there and I knew it. She was at every celebration, big and small. I would never be able to count the number of times I called to get a recipe from her; her barbeque sauce, how she got her lima beans so tasty and tender, her to-die-for Brunswick stew.

She was my “grandma,” even though once my youngest aunt had a daughter and two more aunts had kids right behind her, they changed her name to “Nana.” I was 12, and being a rebel was a specialty. My cousin, she and I were the first and only two for so long; she caved to “Nana,” but not me. Grandma was my grandma from birth until her death almost three years ago.

She died at 85 of a blood disease, a type of pre-leukemia. If you follow the morning show, Good Morning America, one of their hosts, Robin Roberts has been out for some time due to the same illness my grandmother had. But Roberts was able to get a bone marrow transfusion. They figured out too late for grandma what her condition was, and she was too old to survive it anyway.

She spent the last years of her life suffering, doing chemo just to hold on to a life she no longer would recognize or enjoy. She thrived on traveling with her husband to all of the grand kids’ and great-grand kids’ birthdays and family celebrations. She wasn’t living so much as existing once she couldn’t do what she loved.

She also adored gardening and she wasn’t supposed to handle fresh vegetables on chemo. That in itself would have killed her.

One might say at 85, she had a long life. But I say she was enjoying life more than ever, so it was a shame to have to say good-bye so early.

My grandma was a beauty in her youth. In pictures she looks like a movie star. Yet I see my own face there. Maybe there’s a little star in all of us, eh? Passed on from generation to generation like a seed. We could all shine as bright as the people we believe shine if we allowed ourselves, I suppose.

And maybe that’s the point of this musing about my grandma. Maybe I’m not just thinking of her today, but my own spirit. The strength I know is passed on from my lineage.

My grandma.

I miss her, but she shines bright in my heart. I miss parts of me too, the parts that have changed and morphed over the years, some days into a person I don’t even recognize. Have I changed or have I just gotten to know myself better and it brings me to a place of newness, of non-recognition?

Just like getting to know my grandma from a different perspective since death, I see parts of myself die off and be reborn again with changes of my heart. My soul becomes more exposed with each step, just like my grandma’s did with each step towards the Light.

Today, I will appreciate Life. I will accept Life for what it brings my way. I will shine the Light of Acceptance on each situation that arises; not passive acceptance, but acceptance with compassion; first for myself (oxygen mask on me first), then on my children and husband, my family, my community, my state, my country, my world, my universe and beyond.

With love and light to my grandma in this life and where ever she may be today. And love and light to you too!

Over a year ago, my daughter went out the front door of our house and started calling, “Animals, An-i-mal-sss.”  My daughter is loud with a capital L, so it wasn’t a complete shock when my son came storming in the kitchen yelling, “Mom, she did it! The animals really are coming!

I walked out the front door to see a sturdy, gray cat sauntering down our driveway. He came that day and he never left. Having an indoor cat already, it wasn’t a stretch to share the cat’s food. We named him Uno.

Uno

It has been kind of hard to not have control over keeping Uno safe like I can the indoor cat. Once, Uno came to us with a nasty cut on his tail. I watched him groom his self back to perfection. He’s come to the porch with a scratch on his head or ear; nothing too serious, but it gives me glimpses into the life of an outdoor cat.

Welcoming him into our family, we left the garage cracked for him at night. But after a while we got more than the cat. Other animals wanted his food. I came into the garage to find an opossum or two, and I once had an encounter with a raccoon in there. As the raccoon was exiting the garage I ran around to look out of the dining room window. We met eyes, and that was the last time I left the garage open at night.

As a result of our closing the garage at night, I wake almost every morning to find Uno curled up on the porch. As the early riser in my home, it has been my job to open the garage and fill his cup of food. This is a male cat that spends his time out doors chasing things. The cat eats a lot.

It’s a comfort to see him on the porch in the mornings. This is why when he didn’t curl up on my porch on Monday or Tuesday, I went looking for him. I toured the perimeter of my house. I looked in the bushes by the garage. I went over to the woods lining my driveway, and there right next to our house, looking like he was asleep was Uno.

He has passed to the other side. Because there was no blood, I think he was bitten by a snake. I saw a copperhead over by that wall just last week. My son wanted to kill the snake, but I didn’t let him. Just like I didn’t stop Uno from killing the birds and I didn’t stop the birds from killing the worms. I didn’t stop the snake from biting my precious Uno.

Uno possesses a patience that is rarely found in animals or people. I have never met anyone who is more calm and firm in their spirit. When this cat stands beside me, I feel his energy as a hug. He loves to receive love, and in return the person with him receives a feeling of sureness that they are appreciated.

He has allowed my kids to pet him, pick him up and carry him all over the place. He’s fine with four kids petting him at once. My indoor cat hisses at him with no repercussions. Uno never stops being Uno and he seems to accept us all just as we are.

I am doing something different with my sorrow than I have before. Rather than convince myself Uno is better off, or tell myself this too shall pass, I am going to sit with my sadness over the loss of a wonderful friend. I can honestly say I learned lessons about life from this cat. I am happy I was able to provide him with food, a warm place to come inside when he wanted to come in, and a ton of love. Not only did I love him, so did my kids.

Nathan helped bury Uno yesterday and he has plans today to make a headstone for him. He drew a picture of Uno last night and wrote, “Uno and Nathan” as the caption.

Nathan is doing things for Uno. I am going to be with my pain and let it come when it comes. I will release it and then feel it all over again until I am ready to feel it less and less.

My daughter is handling it like one who knows exactly where Uno is and what he is doing. Last night when I was putting her to bed she said, “Cats come back as old men and they all go to Florida.”

I said, “Really?”

And she said, “Yep. Maybe next time we go see Mema we will see him there!”

Maybe we will.

Today, I allow myself to mourn. And, I allow my family to grieve in their own way.